Jun 25, 2005

The Whole Nine Yards


Wow, congrats:) Blogger, thumbs up, now I can post images!
This is my first character in the best time-killer I've had for years. He's called Aral Kosigan, the father of one of my favorite fictional heroes of all time, Miles Vorkosigan. I dropped the nobility prefix 'vor', since it is a democratic world we live in;) I have two more characters and I promise you'll have the opportunity to feast your eyes upon them too:D

Otherwise, I have a lot of undone work, my torrent account was closed after 7 days inactivity, I went to a karaoke party and had tons of fun and alcohol. Omg...ofhangover.

And to think I was afraid it would never be my turn,
as if you could contain the baby in the cradle, and the ashes in an urn.
Maybe no control is just life as usual
Maybe an endless fall is the same as flying high.

I just love this song. Don't bother searching for it in Google :P

Jun 6, 2005

Violent Flurry

I saw Sin City - the most crushing movie of the year. It pierces you, it shatters your preconceived notions of what is allowed and what not, it heightens your perceptions to the maximum. I thought I could even smell the blood, which came in white, red, and yellow. Despite the sketchy plot (after all, it is based on 3 graphic novels, aka comic books), it gripped me and I found myself looking for meaning in the meaningless sequence of events, each triggering more disgust and awe at the same time. Amazing acting, nerve-racking camera, mind-blowing director's vision.

Violence is viewed so casually ('kill him good', one of the characters said), that it achieves the status of a legitimate form of fun alongside sex. [There IS a lot of nudity in the movie, which made me even more determined to go to the gym more often:D] Violence is apparently a deep need of humans, and even violence that makes you flinch holds some kind of perverse attraction. So, that's the way we are. Brutality is a word which comes from the Latin word for a 'beast', and a friend said that most action in the movie is animal-like, but I disagreed. It is easy to transfer to animals the inherent cruetly in humans, but it is my opinion that animals are rarely cruel for cruelty's sake. It is us who are evil, and we cannot proceed to becoming less evil, unless we acknowledge the evil in us as human beings. We are able to enjoy hurting others and get aroused by others' pain (er... not me personally, I am a bit squeamish;). Still, we have a spark of heaven in us and are able to counter hatred if we want, and if we truly aspire to goodness, we will be given a Hand by the Heavenly Helper.

These thoughts have absolutely nothing to do with my warrior profession. Really really. Rather, I have been thinking about being a sinner exposed to God's grace. Do I believe in punishment this side of hell? I don't know. It is written that a parent punishes the child he/she loves. As a parent I'm not so positive about distinguishing between punishment for the sake of justice and discipline, and punishing because anger and frustration rise in me like a hurricane. I'm trying to counter this with love. While playing a warrior I usually listen to quiet and gentle music like Tenhi or Jewel which I believe enhance the peace of mind. I need peace and silence to balance the adrenaline fury I am slowly becoming...